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Friday, January 25, 2008

Lance Armstrong to join Blues?


After last nights startling news in the Liverpool Echo that the Peoples Club are making a magnificent gesture actually offering to pay for Kirkby residents to park outside there own front doors. We can now also reveal that part of there transport strategy that they predict that some 3,000+ Evertonians are to converge on their ill-conceived mid-range stadium in Kirkby on bicycles.

Yes you read it right the peoples club, once renowned for having the largest "walk up" support in the Premiership now appears to also have the largest "cycle up" support in the Premiership.

These startling revelations came to light early this week during Knowsley Councils eagerly anticipated public consultation. Their consultants Steers, Davis Gleave claim that 3,000+ Evertonians will favour cycling to their proposed new stadium. To negate any potential problems they are going to provide some where in the region of 200 cycle racks.

However K.E.I.O.C decided to carry out its own survey with match going Evertonians prior to Wednesdays crunch semi-final against Chelsea. We will be the first to admit that our survey was not exactly scientific but we entered into the spirit of all things green and along with the vast majority of Evertonians we walked to the ground.

Our survey was carried out on the 23 /01/ 08. Between 17.45pm and 19.45pm on Goodison Rd. Below are quotes from various fans, who took part in our survey.

Harry Quinn, When I first heard the news I was overcome with emotion. If only the club had revealed this before the ballot. I would have never voted to reject the Kirkby proposal.

Chris + Christine Boardman (on a tandem) Expressed there delight and informed us that they also cycle to away games. They also informed us that they planned to cycle to Wembley if we were successful this evening.

Eddie Merc, Old Swan informed us that since he hung his saddle his bike had lay idle in the shed but on a more positive note his 12 year old son would keep the family tradition going and he would cycle to games from next season.

C.Hopper Aintree was concerned about Tesco`s policy on selling puncture outfits to children. If his grandson had the misfortune to get a puncture he would have difficulties purchasing a puncture outfit Mr Hopper claimed.

So there you have it, just a small sample of the many views expressed by fellow Blues.

We can confirm that there is no truth whatsoever in the stories linking sporting giant Lance Armstrong with a move to Goodison Park. In spite of many retailers reporting a rush on yellow jerseys and the MegaStore running out of the letter A.

Keioc, once again the first to bring Evertonians breaking news.

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